Swine Flu The Real Story

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The Giant Spaghetti Monster is toying with us feeble humans.This is about the real Swine Flu,what you need to know that they’re not telling us.

Image via Wikipedia

Just hours before the mighty unsinkable Titanic sunk, it was discovered that Jack, being a world traveler and a slut was a total whacked out bestiality nut case. He had received a previously undiscovered strain of Phucologcosis, a debilitating disease that attacks the central nervous system. He had been fornicating with pigs below decks and filling them with his seeds of mal content.

Image Credit Google Images
When the discovery was made, the pigs were cast into the coal burning furnace of the ship. After many hours of sleeping with the other white meat, one of the baby pigs, the one he named Charlotte was suckling on his penis. Jack was passed out and became erect, this scared the little piggy, and it bit the little wiener off.

Image Credit Google Images

Jack screamed and the officer Porky, in charge of pig maintenance ,rushed to his aid and cauterized the wound with a shovel full of hot coals. Next some of the hot coals were placed on Charlottes stomach, burning and melting a hole in the stomach of the young porker.

The penis was retrieved and securely reattached by his beloved Rose. Sad thing is Rose knew nothing of the many hours of bliss shared between Jack and his beloved swine partners, she had been told it was an accident.

A decision was made to add the pigs into the fire. A chemical chain reaction was taking place, the infected chromosomes of the pigs were morphing with the coal, and the fumes were sent out in the atmosphere. This event was happening just 45 minutes prior to the actual sinking of the ship.

The other chain reaction of icebergs colliding had already been set in motion; and the fumes were slowly spreading around the globe.
A few pigs were thrown over board and eaten by rabid polar bears who were angry, hungry and just plain out of their environment.

Image Credit Google Images

This event had also been seen by the mighty Bo Jack who was rowing a small craft across the Atlantic to reach his sworn love, Kate the Great;

Image Credit Kate The Great

at the time nobody believed but he passed the story on down each generation of Bo Jacks.

Image Credit Bo Jack Express Photography we get the picture

Image via Wikipedia

At the same time nearby, Scotty Spock, Captain Kirk and Bones McCoy were doing battle with Klingons who had chased each other through a worm hole.

Image via Wikipedia

As all of this was happening, The Giant Spaghetti Monster was chuckling at his handiwork down below in the mortal plane. He was a sadistic bastard for sure, but since great granddaddy Bo Jack had told the story to me, I must admit, I thought it was pretty damn funny myself.

So the icebergs were colliding, The Titanic was sinking, Rose was getting humped by a pig humper, Klingon blood was spilling into the icy waters, a polar bear ate a Klingon head, after devouring a helpless violated pig, and the flu was off and running.

A few years later, John Wayne was hunting in Alaska and killed one of the great white beasts, sharing the meat with several friends in the small isolated town. The seed was planted and the current epidemic was under way.

Image via Wikipedia

Almost one hundred years later, we are now seeing the uncanny result of this human disaster.
If we are lucky, Russia, Cuba Iran and China will merge into one giant unstoppable force and start WWIII and the termination of the planet as we know it, or else we must endure a long slow painful end of humanity.

Bo Jack Science Division we’ll figure it out so you don’t have to.

Baseball hot dogs apple pie and Chevrolet; a 454 Chevrolet.

Bo Jack there is no substitute. Nothing can stop Bo Jack Nation, oh we are working on a cure it is however estimated that half the population of planet earth will  be decimated before an antidote is developed.

On a more serious note,I realize this is a very sensitive issue, I mean to offend no one as I know this has caused some grief to some families. I’m just trying to lighten the mood with all the crummy stuff going on, the economy and forclosures, lack of faith and now this.

Seriously,wash your hands often and it’s a good idea to keep some anti bacterial gel with you at all times and avoid touching people and staw ayay from anyone who appears sick at all. God bless us help us please in there trying times.

If you can’t smile……….

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