Well the Geekucator has been married now for nearly 18 years and knows a thing or two about relationships. Let’s see with few tips:
1)Tell her you love her, but be sincere. The stereotypical American TV husband told his wife he loved her both when they were engaged and the day they married. The real husband, if he wants to be happy, tells the wonderful woman in his life he loves her every day. I tell her several times a day because it is SO true!
2) You know you married up, so act like it! All men who somehow convince a woman to marry them find out eventually that they are not up to her standards. It’s not that your WW (wonderful wife) puts you down, it’s that as you watch her walk (heh), or see how she takes care of the kids, does the laundry, the dishes, vacuums the floor, mops, cleans the tub, etc., ad infinitum, you realize you aren’t worthy. That’s right, women rock and we are blessed to live with them. So here’s the deal. Help out! Learn to do laundry, clean the toilet, get the kids out of her hair once in a while. Just do something. You and I both know we’ll never be able to keep up with everything she does, but you’d be shocked to find out how just a little helping out will thrill her and show her your love in a tangible way.
3) Date that wonderful woman! Ok, so you’ve been married a while and things are a bit slow. Well, get out of the rut! Take her to a restaurant and a movie, or mini-golf, or the entertainment venue of her choice. Surprise her with a babysitter and a night of just the two of you. Do this regularly. It’s good for both your relationship and your relationship. Get me? 😉
4) Respect her. Dude, she’s smart. If you haven’t figured it out yet she is possibly smarter than you. Get her input on all decisions and keep her informed as to what is going on in your life. Women (and men) want to be involved with their spouses. As Billy Joel succinctly titled his song, “Tell Her About It”. Talk, communicate, share, just a few minutes will do you both a world of good.
5) Don’t fight. Ok, this is one area that annoys the Geekucator. Far too many articles about marriage tell you that arguing is good and necessary for a healthy relationship. They say it, “clears the air”. Garbage! Arguing brings out harsh words and causes painful retorts. If you disagree then discuss it, don’t argue about it. Do you argue with colleagues at work? No? Why not? Because it isn’t socially acceptable! Guess what? It’s not privately acceptable either. This goes back to number 4. If you respect someone you don’t yell at them and you also don’t hold back when there is an issue that needs discussed. You simply bring it up in a non-confrontational way with plenty of time for healthy discussion.
6) Choose to love her. Here it is guys, the simple closing to the whole article. If you get this one right then all of the others will fall into place. Love is a choice. The Geekucator and his WW learned this principle many years ago through experience and a great book, The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. Love her by choice. Choose to tell her you love her, choose to help out around the house, choose to take her on a date, choose to send her out for an evening with her friends for girls night out, choose to sit down with her and share each others time. Just choose love. It’s the easiest thing to do in your relationship and although this isn’t the point, it pays amazing dividends.
Now get out there and be happy!