I won’;t lie, I am on TUMBLR, I love TUMBLR. But every so often a text post pops up with a “I am so lonely I need a boyfriend/girlfriend” message on it and the notes it has is incredible. This leads me to wonder WHY?
I also won’;t lie, I did have a boyfriend I was about to marry YEARS AND YEARS ago. I’;m 28 right now and I have no compunction to get a boyfriend, to get married or to have children. I know, isn’;t that weird? does that make me a horrible person? what about my sex life?
First – I don’;t need a man to define me. I think this idea started with Twilight and persists with Fifty Shade of badly written BDSM smut books. I mean, Bella and Anna have one thing in common (well, since Fifty Shades was a fan fiction first this isn’;t surprising) they are both low esteem women looking for some guy to “make” them feel sexy and wanted. Granted Edward at leasts want to have a commitment before he has sex with Bella. Christian Grey is a big bag of dicks because Anna knows jack shit about his life style and even after they sign the contract he doesn’;t go by it. All of her boundaries are thrown out the window and she’;s made to feel GUILTY abut it. Okay, I’;ll write something on that later. What I am supposed to say here is that you are a beautiful woman all ready and you don’;t need a man to DEFINE you. You DEFINE YOURSLEF. Savvy? GO out and do thing that make you happy.
Secondly – Not all women are wired to be mothers. That’;s right. I said it. I am not cut out to be a mother and that’;s all right. Never mind the fact that all but one younger cousin in my family are married or engaged or all ready have kids. Even my sister is close to having her first child. I know it feels like shit though. I mean, here all these other people having kids and it’;s EXPECTED of me and yet I don’;t want kids. I don’;t want smelly, crying children hanging on me all day long. And ya know what else….THAT’;S OKAY.
It’;s okay to not do what society expects you to do. You don’;t have to follow Kate and Prince what’;s his name in the media. You don’;t have to wear the latest fashions and you don’;t have to watch the latest tv shows. You can be in whatever fandom you want, you can dress however you want and people can go suck an egg if they don’;t like it.
Enjoy being single. Go to the theater, go to the mall, go to work, make friends, read a good book, clean your house however you want. Be happy with yourself.