Paralyzed Forever Lost Without

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The man’;s full name Ayuda Rangga Winata, brown eyes, eyebrows were thick enough, symmetrical facial lines, sharp beak nose, has a skin pigment olivaceous, athletes bodied, not a glance womenfolk who admire the charm he has. However, after the departure of her lover. Rangga just think life without the rainbow, only has two colors, black and white. Life is gray, dull, repetitive and say where all tired and crummy. Maybe that’;s what he said, after the departure 2bulan lover was going to marry died, Rangga accident. Cause paralysis in both legs.

***

I no longer think about how I was doing. Because I was dead, and my body is still on the verge of silence. Like a corpse, without grave. I just enjoy his dark confined to a wheelchair. I am a sissy man who has made their own dead lover. And I hate to lie, I do not want to kill myself.

Honey, why do not want to be dancers around me so as not silent.

You better hurry to leave the palm of this hand.

Where embrace shade your eyes. Two eyes are clear.

I’;ve tied appointment

We’;re going to get married, but you prefer a place in the desert

In nature more than a box of drawers that ultimately as we were looking for.

There are many women who tell her, maybe she hoped that one of them could give her grandchildren. But I have no love. It does not have a sense of, let’;s say I have a blind eye view of the world without. I’;m blind. Long, in residence fragility. Dwell on my rigid chair jest as it is, every day. Look at it! Which will, the wife elect the man who will become her husband. I cannot stand takhbiratul ikhram. The name of God was filled with my lips still vibrating! If there are several women lined up waiting like me, and some women were just mad with the rest of the facility over a decade ago my position and also treasure my father left. No longer, about time. That was I embarrassed. Why should I choose this fate!

***

Still there lies the hope, at least. If only the reality Rangga want more try. However, it is very expensive smile, and economical to say. Some women who deliberately sent his mother to care for her less than a week stating unable fed up with his attitude also burst.

Each morning, Rangga always see the end of the same angle. Gazebo, where he describes Julia for the first time in a melody with a vibration that has been spun promises lively pitch before dying. Again and again he tried to recall fond memories of it, at least to treat the meaning of longing that is not possible anymore remedied. The more he remembers, the more he blames himself.

One time, a week before the exact day that has been prepared for the wedding day with a deceased lover, Yulianda Dwi Aryadhi. A woman with the arrival of dusk and dawn he brought together, come before Rangga. Rangga feel upset, angry, and repeatedly. Because the woman continued to talk, feed answers to questions.

“Can you shut up! Who are you, my sassy wiping sweat with a dirty rag! Stop talking! Or not … “on a high note Rangga scold her.

“I, Andian. Andian Melati. Who will now take care of you. And stop to sing. I wiped the sweat problem, I do not use a dirty cloth. But cloth filled with love, willing to land in your face, bad-tempered man. “With a flat tone and relaxed even a little happy smile, Andian reply.

At first, they were filled with meetings and shouted in reply with a sarcastic smile. But because Andian, tough woman who also graciously educate each reply what will be in doing it. Rangga quite concerned that if this continues to be true she could make the blazing fire. Andian Melati, as the name “Jasmine”. Light-eyed, with a neat look ready smile and a hello from sincerity, scent. His voice was low and the clever play wink or even with two hands he could play anything on the touch screen.

“Why are you still survive here? Am I less rude?! I do not like to see you pretend with kindness! Never again humbled me. I can do it myself! “Angry Rangga.

“Sorry, I just do the mother to convey the message. Nothing more than that. And thank you for being like this. I am very happy to take care of you. Today behold, the rain still hold a secret when there are multiple colors of the rainbow. I really like the rainbow.. ”

“Do you think that rainbow? No more than the lost colors later. “This time Rangga lowering high tone.

“Rainbow … rainbow as describe. Lovely to look and feel a variety of colors. ”

This time Rangga, lingering a few minutes staring at the eyes Andian.

“You will not understand my position! I have color blindness spell step variety. And stop to introduce what is a rainbow, a ghost after this rain! ”

“Why? For the love of each person is free to feel happy and injuries? But some people prefer to accentuate her sense of injury. Is not love wonderful? We have love in every soul, we have a conscience why we can fall in love and choose what we will do tomorrow. Your mother could tell you some things, about you .. about your past. Look with your eyes open, not all men are as fortunate as you. ”

“What is my lucky? I was dead in my life! I was paralyzed, I lost the first time to make love is real happy, I lost my dreams until my nights are always stolen. And look, I’;m a man without power! But the shadow was always hovering dancing and berate. All were reminded, that I never had a love with a woman who is now dead leaving all that you say rainbow! “Rangga directly rotating wheel chair, and leave Andian.

“Are you going to blame her, Rangga?” Said Andian subject.

*********

I hate the lack of politeness time. Do not think I’;ve lost for the second time, I’;ve won many times so now it does both I fight again. I do not know what she was carrying me. However, this time I feel guilty about treating it like an old clock was broken but remained faithful to remind each and futile remorse orderly.

Unfortunately, this time I will confine myself in this space.

No longer with a beautiful woman named Andian

I undo what would later be broken

To extinction was me, snitch on your shadow

**********

Almost five days, Rangga locked himself in the room. Not eating, or bathing. This alarmed the whole house. Also some plants that have not been in since she said five days ago. Windows locked tight, with strict safeguards. For hard to get, if not key in the open. Suddenly Andian cry, Rangga front door. He begged Rangga out.

Rangga the man could not hear the cry of a woman quietly. He covered my ears so as not to be heard weeping. But it all boils. Rangga weak and exposed to similar bodies, opening the door. Andian hugged Rangga. This time Rangga not refuse a woman who initially embraces no longer wanted to meet. Andian Rangga immediately brought into the backyard.

“Rangga, today let’;s say. Me and you are on the side of the house lover. Lover’;s body in it … and stop turning yourself. Because frankly it worse Yuli see you suffer like this. You know, Rangga. I do not know Yuli, lover. But I know, he’;s definitely the best woman for you. That can make traces through. Because he will not have the best woman, and vice versa. Now you no longer need, to hide your tears. I am a woman, who has repeatedly fostered by tears-tears. But what? I came to know, crying is a thing that should not be made in such a bad way. But the smile, the test is always easier for us to know how to smile wider, more beautiful .. Rangga, I Dian. For you maybe I’;m just a nurse who presumptuous. But I’;m not crippled woman facing trial link between giving and losing. All belong to God, but remember God never made ​​us toys … “said Andian, as women in the gloom Rangga flame bearer.

After that, Rangga tried to stand up from the chair wheels. And he dropped her on the ground that they think this is the home of Julia, her Beloved. Tears welled free pass her curves.

“Honey, I’;m sorry .. I’;m too stupid. Why am I so stupid! Why I decided the opportunity that God has given me. I do not worry too much, I was too harsh. Departure was severing all nerves, and I too want to enjoy your death, dear. At first, I hope. We will decorate each room and in our homes. Then we proceed with a child born from your womb. Every morning I would always work and deliver their schools. I’;ll be happy. Because maybe at that time I was very happy just like you. Being a parent. With love and affection. No less. But I cannot erase the dream, baby .. every night and morning to again and again, I was a dead man, until the second Puspa today. You know, there was a woman named Andian Budget has made ​​me realize. I would like to introduce to you, dear. If this is what you sent to grant that dream. Well, I’;ll start from the second. I will love him, and I alone will know how to slow to forget you … “Rainfall Rangga with great sobs choking her chest. Wipe gently with his land that he believed his girlfriend graveyard. Then he tried to stand and walk despite falling repeatedly, and crawled like a worm, he plucked flowers that surround the page. Then he kept on it.

Andian deeply moved watching the seconds disconnection Rangga slump. ian very surprised, after hearing how there are sincere men who raised the love he had for a woman who has gone, broken off in the face of this earth. Andian was surprised, that Rangga. A man who always called him, would end up being a potential husband. And they would love each other. Start a new sheet, with things more beautiful it is, because the pain is just an unnecessary pause lengthened. Because it can, is missing. Because God always has a way of how each individual human being of his face a fate that has been discharged.

Yes, love does not live at the age of

But always the eternal soul.

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