Who Gets Custody of The Sofa in a Relationship Break-Up??

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I had my little flat, nicely mish mashed with stuff, and different coloured furniture and nothing matched. But it was home. When my ex moved in he would come home practically every single day from work with something new to deck the flat out in. This was sweet at first, I was glad he was paying an interest, but soon I was questioning the things he was buying as to me they seemed a waste of money as we didn’t need them. I would have much preferred him to come through the front door with a bunch of flowers, bottle of wine and tickets to a spa hotel/theatre show/ holiday abroad rather than a vegetable rack or toasted sandwich maker (which he used once and then was stashed away in the cupboard for all eternity).

So slowly my living room turned into matching neutral cream/beige. First it was a cream rug. Then the ridiculously enormous coffee table to match (there was nothing wrong with my previous table except it was black and my ex didn’t think it matched). Then came the matching curtains. I understood his point that he wanted it to feel like it was his home too and not just him squatting in my place, but I realised with horror that he was actually completely taking over and turning my lovely little mismatched home into something designer.

Boxing Day came, and instead of allowing me to veg in front of Mary Poppins stuffing my face with mince pies, I was reluctantly dragged to the sales at a furniture store. Traipsing around like a sulking teenager, I didn’t care about the ‘deals’ on as I loved my 2-seater sofa and 2 spinning reclining armchairs. Anyway, as you’ve probably guessed, we purchased a huge CREAM sofa and armchair to match the now CREAM living room. It cost us £1000, and he wanted the matching foot stools too, to which I stamped my foot down in refusal.

He put the sofa and chair under his name on his card, so the deal was I’d pay a bit towards it every month. We never used the armchair which was a castle in itself that was quickly owned by my cat that used to sit like a Queen perched on her enormous throne. Bless her.

I sadly said goodbye to my old second hand sofa and reclining chairs, and we sat on cushions on the floor for a few nights until the new monster was delivered. It took up the entire back wall and could easily fit 5 people on it. This was great for me stretching out on, and also came in handy for my ex to sleep on for a few nights after domestic disputes. It was also great to use after an argument as we would both sit on either end giving each other daggers, but the space between us was so huge that there was no chance of accidental contact and it was like we were in different counties.  

5 months after the purchase we split up and I kicked him out. He took the weekend to empty the flat of all his stuff. We had just purchased a new TV together and he took that and left me with my old 14 inch one. I came home to find the new TV gone and screamed my hatred for him and sat and cried because I didn’t know how to tune my 14 inch one back in. I left a strongly worded voicemail for him, so the next day when he finished collecting the rest of his stuff, I came back home to find that even though we had argued like hell, he had had the decency to plug and tune my small TV back in. I was grateful.

So now the problem became the sofa. It was in his name. He had paid for the majority of it and would have to continue paying for it as I had now shut the joint account down which I paid my contribution into. Therefore he wanted it back. I refused. Property is 9/10ths of the law. It was in MY living room, in MY flat. But he was paying for it!! That wasn’t the point, it was the principle of the thing – he took OUR TV.  I asked what the hell was he going to do with a sofa that size when he’d moved to a shared house and he only had a bedroom where as I had an entire flat??? He said I had paid the contribution of the armchair so I could keep that, but the sofa was his. Tough.

I won custody of the sofa due to my refusal to give into his demands.  I lounged on it in peace with a clear conscious. 2 years later I moved out and no longer needed it; it was surplus to requirements and took up too much room. It had also lost its colour slightly and was looking a bit worse for wear, especially with all the snags, tears and rips courtesy of my cat. So I gave it back.

As far as I know it’s still sat in the bedroom of a shared house looking a bit grubby in a room that is also beige. Not sure it will look so cream now though…….


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