How to get along with your children while trying to discipline them, especially, when you do not know them completely as a person?Or how do you discipline your children while trying to establish a good relationship with them?
How to discipline a child is a real challenge to a father like me who was away from home for a long-long time and decided to stay for good in order to fulfill his duties as a father.
As an x-OFW, I don’t really know where and how to start to feed them with the things I want them to learn from me as their father.
They were only four years old, two years old, and one year old when I left them for abroad.Now, they’re grown up and on the stage where they have to learn the looks of life as teenagers.
Whatever things they learn now will be added to the things they learned as children.
Well and good.
However, what will you do if many of what they have learned as children were not the things you like to be their moral foundations to use in travelling this life?
Almost everything we learned as a child is the ones we use to make out our decisions and is the basis whether we can be good or bad when we grow up.
I do believe that all people are strongly influenced by the things they learned as children because that’s already the attitude and moral character inculcated into their mind.
So, as they grow up it’s not easy for them to just forget what’s already ingrained as their own character. In their everyday living decisions, their childhood learning always comes in and affects their decisions.
As a father, I want my children to grow up well trained, and well disciplined.But my problem is how?
Many of the things they are doing now are retained from the things they learned as children.Simple things, like how do you behave in front of the table?Or how do you answer back to your parents’ order or request?
Those can be changed maybe as they mature, but, how about, not surrendering change from the grocery when you asked them to go buy milk?This is how theft is learned I believed.
How about saying, “I’ll do it later” to a thing you asked them to do which needs immediate attention?I believed this is how procrastination is mastered.
Another is not learning to save or spend your money wisely?It can be a personal financial disaster later on their life.
These little things are nothing in our mind as parents but have big impact on the learning of a child. Anything they do now is a foundation that will determine their whole being and standing in the society in the near future.
The things they learn from us, they cannot learn it from school.So, we, parents should be able to start training them young, and start it from the daily simple things we do at home.
And as a father, I want to instill into their mind that there are laws in this life everyone must adhere to.But like I said my problem is how at their age now?
Though our relationship is not that so strange, I don’t know how to approach them – I don’t want to destroy that little respect we have on each other. And time is going by fast.A year is almost gone and I still cannot figure out atleast the better approach to tell them their mistakes.
So, my appeal to the more experienced fathers out there, what advise can you give to a situation like where I am now?