Are you each bullheaded, refusing to make concessions or compromise on issues?
If your relationship is in trouble and you are fearing the inevitable, here are some suggestions that may help you to save it.
#1. Try to refrain from casting the blame on your partner.
We don t often accept the blame ourselves when a relationship turns sour. He does not pay attention to what I say anymore. She is not very warm or passionate. Why is it that he never does anything nice for me? If she would just quit pestering me, then I would do more for her. Saying it is the other person s fault won t contribute to making everything better, it only makes everyone defensive. Begin by accepting your partner for the person they are instead of who you want them to be.
#2. Try to stop being demanding.
Not being able to do things without your significant other nearby is unhealthy for your relationship. Dependency has led to a number of relationship failures. You need to understand that it is normal and necessary for you and your mate to take some time apart to do little things, like shopping. If you discover that you want to spend all of your time with your mate, take this as a sign that you should get a hobby that you can do by yourself.
#3. Do you speak with one another?
Communication is essential to a functional relationship. If your realize the only way you can have a conversation is when you argue, say something sarcastic, or make a nasty statement, it is time to stop this behavior; you are being demeaning and not showing respect. You wouldn t speak to friends or associates like this, so why speak with your loved one in this manner?
#4. Don t listen to anything that is not true.
Do you continuously imagine false situations about what your mate does or thinks? That little voice in your head tells you things like your mate has lost the desire for you since they didn t stop what they were doing at a time when you needed attention. Ignore those mistaken beliefs because they are distorting reality for you.
#5. Are you a good listener?
Do you have any idea what your partner s interests are? Do you hear their opinion when you argue and let them have a fair chance to explain their point of view? There are times when we just have to be right and we won t listen to anything someone else says. When a problem presents itself, try to be calm and open minded to your partner s opinions and listen to them. Otherwise, you may miss hearing something important and, yes, sometimes you are wrong.
In some relationships, if you follow the previous suggestions it still may not be enough for the situation to change significantly. If this is the situation, then your relationship has endured enough and it is necessary for the two of you to spend some time away from each other. Use this time to clear your mind and make some decisions about what you want.