In everyday life we meet with lots of people who have small mouth and big tongue to criticize. How many of us feel helpless when not able to deal with a person who is critical. There are some common behaviors in response to criticism. When being the victim of criticism people get emotional and reply in aggressive manner. They are ready to throw words or things at those who criticize
Some people reply in a passive manner. They suddenly remember important piece of work and start making critical person realizing that they are in hurry, by seeing watch again and again. In most of the situations they prefer flight rather than fight.
So here we go! No more flights; prepare to fight against criticism I have some techniques to share.
First, recognize everyone has different ways of perceiving world, so the rule of thumb is never become emotional when being criticized.
Second recognize whether the criticism is constructive or is of no account.
If it is useful then
Rephrase it and ask again to make sure you are getting the right part. Accept it and explain if you think it is necessary to justify yourself. For example,
If someone says, ” Your desk is a mess!” and it is right you have done that, then
” yes, my desk is a mess but I was working on some Important task so I didn’t take care.” or you can reply
“yes, my desk is a mess because I was working on some important task, could you help me in managing my desk when I’m frustrated.”
If the criticism is wrong or half part of it right or half is wrong, how it can be dealt,
First if some part of criticism is right and some wrong, accept the right part in a way describing previously and ignore the part which is incorrect.
Second if the person is totally wrong you could reply in a probability manner. To let the person realize may be he is right but you are not agreeing with it. For example,
“You have chosen the wrong color you should haven chosen green, it would look nice on you.” you don’t agree so you could reply,
“May be you are right if had chosen green color, it would have looked nice on me.” you showed other person might be he is right but you are not agreed.
Third if the criticism is vague and you feel yourself lost to know either it is constructive or it’s just a criticism, you could clear it from the person. For example,
“Your dressing is senseless.” it’s a huge term make it specific by asking,
Would it be nice if you explain senseless, what actually makes you feel in that way.”
“Your color scheme, I don’t like it. It’s not my favorite colors.” Here it made sense; the critic is not criticizing you for improvement. He is criticizing because he doesn’t like the colors. In that case you can go for probability answer.
If critic reply is constructive instead of previous one. For example,
“Your dressing is senseless.”
“Would it be nice if you explain senseless, what actually makes you feel in that way?”
“Yea your wardrobe is full of dark colors dresses and with tuxedo. In summer it would be uncomfortable for you.”
Here the criticism has sense and you can accept it and take helping hand if feels difficulty.