Many of us observe different types of people and based on what we observe we tend to categorize them in different ‘slots’. For instance the first thing we see in people is their appearance, demeanor and the general behavior and based on the analysis of these three things we figure out what type of a person one maybe… but the first thing that could completely alter or confirm your assumption is when the person opens his mouth!
YES! The speech is the ultimate and easiest way to literally figure people out, from their priorities to worries, their past and present, and being conservative to broad minded. So what exactly do we look for when listening to a person? Well, here it is. . .
Finger print words:
When a person talks, listen closely for any one or two common words, which are repeatedly used and form a pattern of reoccurring in successive sentences. For instance when having a chat with her family or friends a teenaged girl repeatedly uses a name specially a guy’s= believe me he is the next big thing or buddy in her life!
The big pronoun:
AH! The word many of us just love: me, my, mine, and I myself. We notice how many people often use it and instinctively we think of that person as a bore but it can mean something more, when “one’s automobile is out of order” when a person’s psychic equipment is grating and squeaking, his attention should be directed towards it much of the time and so either the person is self centered and wants attention or has a major ego problem .Hospitalized mental patients use the word ‘I’ oftener then any other, much as once every twelve words, three times more than normal.
One way of recognizing a person’s values and priorities is by cataloguing the adjectives he uses for approval and disapproval. Say if a person is practical he would use words like ‘feasible’ , ‘applicable’ and ‘functional’ for good things and things he doesn’t like are ‘unworkable’ for him. Similarly an emotional, artistic person may have a totally different set of adjectives.
Life thumbnail, quote and simile:
Individuals have certain dominant themes highly revealing of persona and character. The metaphors, similes and images a person uses not only reflect his experience but also what he thinks. Like images of jumping off a cliff, hanging by a rope and behind the bars depict a suicidal urge and a problematic background.
Psychologist have devised a sort of emotional barometer by comparing the number of words one uses for expressing discomfort to the number of words used for liking and relief.In a casual conversation if a man mentions the weather is ‘horrible’, the news is ‘appalling’ and how ‘dull’ books are written these days and the traffic is so ‘aggravating’, it wouldn’t take another word for you to believe he is out of tune with the world.
Verb tenses provide a hint to as how much a person lives in present or dwells in past. If past tense predominates it indicates melancholy and depression in the individual. A passive sentence denotes feeling of impotence while active sentences a sense of power and control.
A long pause, cough, laugh, sniffle and throat clearing in a conversation shows how much a person is hesitating and unconfident, specially indicating any trouble in the area of what he is speaking of. “I..er…uh love you” means something very different from a spontaneous “I love you.”. Doctors usually look for such clues and hints when taking a patient’s history and such method can help us to understand ourselves and one another.