Sunday, December 17

Reading People: Body Language, Poker Face

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Most people tell the truth most of the time, for it is extremely hard to keep up with your own lies. People also tend to behave in a pattern. Find out a person’s pattern and you will have a key to the person’s mind. Thus having poker face may be very advantageous and not only in a game of poker. There are very few who may congratulate themselves on such an achievement although without similar command of the rest of the body and words poker face may prove to be of little use. So how can one have this unexpressive, unreadable poker face matched with perfectly relaxed, gesture and fiddle free body?

One easy way to acquire that unreadable poker face is to have an injection of Botox, which will promptly and conveniently erase all facial expressions the only thing you will have to worry about now is that your eyes, your voice, your words and your body do not betray you. If Botox is not an option you have to learn how to pay attention to your face and keep it relaxed and unexpressive at all times, if nothing else it will help by smoothing out the wrinkles. Your body should be arranged in comfortable, relaxed position, no arm or leg crossing, and no unnecessary movements, gestures or fidgeting. Let it just hang there, while you talk. Here is a word of caution, if you are arrested, having poker face and relaxed body may actually get you further into trouble proving better any words of confession your guilt, for innocent people wrongfully accused don’t play games, they are eager to prove their innocence, and anger is expected.

Carefully observe the individual you are trying to read. Is he or she lying to you? Establish a base line, or what someone acts like when they she/he is not lying. Ask few questions to which you know the answer, observe how individual replies. Ask a question to which you know the answer and to which the individual is most likely to reply with a lie, observe carefully how the individual replies when telling a lie. Now you have a “tell”. Pay attention to deflections, when people avoid answering the question by answering some other question, or answering a question with a question- this is precisely when you are about to hear a big lie. Pay attention to facial expressions, people betray their emotions unconsciously. Pay attention to the person’s voice, words can be a lie, but the voice will tell the truth. Pay attention to person’s eye movements, when someone is remembering details, their eyes move to the right (your right). When someone is making something up, their eyes move to the left (your left). The rule is reversed for lefties.

Pay attention how close someone is positioned. The closer people place themselves to you, the more they like you, the more they are open to you. Observe the person’s head and body direction, if turned to you, the person likes you and is opened to you. If someone mirrors you, it is a sign that they are interested in you. If the person crosses arms, they are closing themselves off to your influence, perhaps they are uncomfortable around you. Hands on hips body position indicates bossy attitude. Women tend to play with their hair when they are uncomfortable around someone they like. Confident people will make prolonged eye contact and have a strong posture.


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