It is like a dot – a single little black dot that stains a picture painted perfect….
There are times when everything seems to momentarily freeze, when your heart seems to stop beating and your lungs seem to pump no more air, and there suddenly lay before you are thousands of snapshots of your whole life. This moment could be anytime in the day – when you are taking a bath, or eating a late lunch, or in between busy hours. Or it could be in the night – when you are listening to old unforgotten music, or reading a paperback, or when you are waiting for sleep to come. Nonetheless, it comes before you know it. And when it comes, it hits like thunder. And you slowly become drained of all possible emotions, like a void inside a shell. Yes, drained of all possible emotions, except for one. Sadness.
This is a more profound kind of sadness. Multidimensional that it touches every part in you. It may not bring tears, but it could weaken the spirit and the will. It is the sadness that springs out of realization, but of not realizing as well. It is complex and indefinable.
And no matter how much you think that you should not feel it, you still feel it. Like when you think you have everything you have wished for. Or like when you have already said and done what should have been said and done. Or like when you have the people you truly treasured around you. Or when it seems you could not pray for anything more for yourself… But still that sadness lurks in you.
Could we be satisfied with our life yet feel a little certain sadness deep inside?
Or is it simply human to feel that way?
But like the dot on a painting, we could cover it up and achieve perfection. Or, we could just let it stay that way….