Firstly, you need to be confident. If you don’t think that you are worth someone’s time, most likely you’re not. Look in the mirror, this is you. Everyone has flaws, whether they are physical or otherwise. Use these to your advantage. You’re a real person and these quirks can actually make you more attractive. You should not change yourself for anyone. You should find a way to be happy wherever your life may be. If you’re happy with exactly who you are, she will be too.
Be interesting. Think about your hobbies, interests and life experiences. Can you think of any? If you can’t, we have a problem. You can start by reading a book. Pick one up and read a chapter. Stop making excuses, everyone has time to read. Some people think that hobbies are something as specific as collecting stamps or playing a sport. They really don’t have to be. Do you listen to a lot of music? Have a favorite band? Do some research and find similar musicians. You could learn a lot and possibly find some pretty great obscure tunes. Do you enjoy cooking? Get a cookbook or look up some recipes online. Do things that you enjoy. These are hobbies. You can also volunteer. Women love a man who occasionally volunteers. *Please, do not lie about any of this. If you tell a woman you love to cook, play football and volunteer at least once a month and you really don’t. She is going to find out and hate you. More about honestly later.
Keep your head high. You are not inferior to anyone and you need to realize that. EVERYONE loves confidence. Just as you find a woman with confidence absolutely divine, she will think the same of you. No one is too good for you (those who think that they are too good are not worth the time of day because they are arrogant trash).
Go out on a Limb. How does one ever succeed if they don’t take chances? Go after what you want, you will not regret it. In the end (even after a rejection) you’ll feel great that you did. It takes a man to take that chance, you can do it. You will never have to wonder ‘what if?’ So, ask out that the cute Barista at your coffee shop or your cute neighbor. Chances are you’ll both be glad that you did.
Wondering how to ask someone out? It will probably sound nothing like you have rehearsed. In that sheer moment of terror and excitement you will most likely mess up. It’s okay, we understand. I learned something while I held a very unpleasant job as a debt collector; do not ask yes or no questions. If you give someone the option to say no there is automatically a fifty percent chance they will. Instead, introduce yourself or (if you already know them) ask them an open ended question. Examples: What is your favorite restaurant? What’s your favorite coffee shop around here? Find out the answers and say that you would love to take her out to dinner/coffee/movie. Most likely (because you’re awesome and worth it) she will be surprised and flattered and will say yes or provide you with her phone number. If this does not happen, be cool. It is not the end of the world. There is somewhere around three billion women in the world. I am absolutely certain you will find someone.
Now, if you do get a date with that woman. You do the planning, unless she is absolutely hell bent on going somewhere specific. There is definitely nothing more unattractive then uncertainty. Make a plan, let her know. Look nice on the date, dress appropriately. You do not have to definitely wear a tie or dig out your best dress shoes. Make sure your clothes are fitting for the situation and that you look clean and put together. Do not dominate the conversation. Make sure to ask her questions and mind your body language. Do not sit there with folded arms; one might think you were bored or uncomfortable.
If a date goes well and you think you would like a second, call her. I know that there is some sort of ‘three day rule’ guys like to adhere to. But, if you like her and want to call the next day, call her. I would bet she is probably hoping you do.
Now let’s have a little conversation on honesty. Well, this is a difficult concept for most people, as it would seem. Let me put this simply. Honesty is sexy. When you are enough of a man to say what you really want or believe, then more power to you. Best find out now then three months (or longer) later if it means the relationship will not work. Please be honest. We will respect and trust you for this.