Friday, December 15

Mean Girls, Mean Boys And How to Handle Them

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People are social creatures. We live in communities, cities and countries. We are all dependent on each other. We depend on others who grow food and animals for us to eat, we depend on others to make us clothes and shoes. We depend still on others to make us cars and build us home. We depend on surgeons to operate on us, we depend on pilots to take us places where we want to go. We depend on teachers to teach our kids. We also depend on each other for love, friendship, and understanding. It is in our nature to depend, love, serve, to be nice and considerate just like it is in a nature of healthy cell to do its job and thus help the composite, the body to survive and flourish. In return the cell survives and flourishes as well. The cell cannot be stupid or damaged enough to think it can survive alone, steal and hoard all the resources for itself and dispense with the body and its needs, but when it does happen the cancer is borne.

Why do people do mean things to each other? Contrary to popular belief people are not born equal. There is no equality when it comes to understanding, quickness of mind, reasoning and learning ability. So what do the unlucky do? They act out, have attitude and engage in all sorts of unhealthy behavior. Then the question becomes- what should you do confronted with such individual? The best thing to do is to limit your interaction, for example, if someone cuts you off on a highway stay away from that car don’t pursue or cut them off in return. Let that be the end of your interaction. Do you really want to get to know that person better? Be selective, interact with people that give you pleasure. It may not be this simple if the “unpleasant” individual is your coworker or even worse your spouse.

Confronted with obnoxious individual at work the best plan is to concentrate on your duties, your work and to minimize the contact with the individual. Don’t be confrontational, don’t bring feelings into it this will only make your “relationship” deeper. Be always polite, but uninterested. Don’t gossip or otherwise discuss the individual with the coworkers. This individual should be a boring subject, not the center of attention. If it is your boss or supervisor who is obnoxious you should consider changing the job and as soon as possible.

The least pleasant scenario is if your partner, love of your life became intolerably “unpleasant”. You have to ask yourself and your partner what could have happened to bring on such a change and if anything what could be done to remedy the situation. What happened to the love and respect? Is it still there? If not, there is no point in torturing yourself and your partner, and it is the right time to move on and leave that relationship behind.


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