I don’t support spouses of the same sex being allowed to marry. Today, of course, the battle for Proposition 8 continues in California. I find this battle very interesting, because even before the election, the state Supreme Court ruled that this proposition could be validly added to the state constitution. Now, the court is ruling that it isn’t valid now that it is a part of the state constitution. Talk about confusion of your status. I believe the relationship of same spouses is distinct and it does not benefit society to treat it the same way as marriage. I can support registration as domestic partners; I think this makes the most sense for this type of relationship.
Let us look at why marriage is even registered to begin with. What purpose does it serve? It lets society have a record that each partner to the marriage agreed to take on certain legal responsibilities, including the financial support of the spouse, and the support of any children resulting from the marriage. It provides a record that can be checked to prevent someone from marrying under false conditions of age or single status. It provides a way for each spouse to prove that they qualify for the benefits that result from the marriage. It gives the government a way to prove legal responsibility toward one’s spouse and children, so that the state is not taking on this responsibility. Since children are often the result of marriage, the government has an obligation to make sure they are taken care of by those legally obligated to do so. Recording marriages allows the government to perform this obligation. Encouraging marriage provides a way for a culture to continue on in the future, and a place for children to be raised.
Same sex relationships go in a different direction. They do not have children arising out of the relationship itself without outside assistance. Adoption is one thing; I don’t object to need children being given a home. The problem though, is our society does not recognize to parents of the same sex as parents. With adoption, both spouse could be listed as guardians with equal custody. But with children of one spouse and not the other, the children’s parentage must be listed on the birth certificate. Even if the spouses don’t list the outside parent, I feel certain that one day those children will want to know who their parent is. Beside, they have a right to know for medical reasons alone. I believe that these situations set up the creation of split families form the get go; this should not be done. Enough single and double families result from accident as it is. I can’t imagine the children of the donating spouse being too happy about suddenly having brothers and sisters they never knew about. Even harder, I can’t image creating children and then having no say in their upbringing. I know we have grown used to surrogate mothers, but most people don’t realize these agreements are still illegal under law. Legally, you can’t pay someone to bear your children; even if you both agree. I still feel that spouse of the same sex cannot fulfill the conditions of marriage in and of themselves. Thus, I think domestic partnerships are the way to go.
Yes, there are certain legal situations that married people can take advantage of to benefit them. I have no objection to domestic partners being granted these rights also, except for some relating to children. I do object to them being granted to those who have not either been married or registered. I think it is okay for society to set up some limits. Parents need to be responsible for all their children; I don’t agree with creating children intentionally who will never be raised by their parents.
So far, it has been not possible to show that homosexual tenancies are inherited. If they were, I might feel differently than I do now. Of course that would create the bigger issue of correcting the “condition.” Homosexuality is still a choice. That is why I favor the domestic partner laws. Also, I believe that domestic partners should only be an option for same sex relationships. If you are heterosexual, you can join under the marriage laws.
I think our society has many more difficult problems to deal with that are not helped by the time and effort devoted to this cause. I think the time has come to move on and let domestic partners be the option for those of the same sex.