Friday, December 15

Planning a Wedding With a Not-So-Perfect Family

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Whenever we fantasize about an upcoming event where we are going to include all of our nearest and dearest friends and family in something we are very invested in; there comes that screeching record scratch moment when you all of sudden get a glimpse of reality of how the event could turn out. That is usually when you feel those little hairs on the back of your neck standing at attention because you realize that no matter how much energy you put into planning there is a basic law in nature that states: you cannot control how other people will conduct themselves and inevitably there will be surprises that await you. 

We all want our people to behave in a civil and decent manner and yet it is usually at weddings and some other big events (could be the alcohol flowing) that our favorite people tend to take on different personalities that leaves us dumbfounded. Usually it is because it may well be the only venue that all of the family members or friends will be under one roof at one time so we as human beings think to ourselves, yes, this will be a great time to get some baggage off my chest. Why in the world would Cousin Martha pick your beloved day to tell everyone she was born Cousin Mike? How can anyone justify punching a bartender in the nose when the bride and groom are just walking out for their first dance as husband and wife? You may also find that you hadn’t realized how many blended families exist in this world until you try to do a seating chart for the reception. Expect the unexpected and you will be much less stressed out. 

Having all of the guessing games as to how everyone will act or behave 3 months from now is a futile effort. The reason for this is life is always full of surprises it keeps us hopping. The best planning you can do is to remain objective and not take on the unattainable burden of being responsible for everyone else’s actions, emotions, communications, etc. Because if Aunt Hilda winds up breaking her hip doing the Hokey Pokey it is just not something you could have controlled and if your sisters husband picks your special day to announce to everyone he is gay, this behavior will reflect on him; not you. So do what you can to prevent any catastrophes and after that just enjoy everyone’s company and celebrate!

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