When you are married, you are for most a couple, a team, life partners together. You do most things together and almost seem to merge together as one, in some respects. But through what should be a kind merging, sometimes individuality is lost. Even in a modern era, when the fight for equality between the sexes has for most part been won, in a marriage, there can still be some domination by the husband or the wife-destroying the individuality-in what becomes ultimately an unkind merging.. Even if there isn’t, being so tied together can ultimately have tragic results, if one or the other spouse dies.
Through a loss of individuality, the surviving partner has been so linked to the other, effectively they don’t know what to do and how to cope. Keeping yourself as a separate person too ultimately does help in dealing with a death or divorce of your partner. Some people may not know who they are when they first get married, and may take years to find themselves anyways. However, it is always important to discover and keep yourself, your mindset, who you are as a person when you are married. Ultimately, it helps to maintain your marriage-for you grow together, and as individuals. It helps you to interact better with your spouse, for you are growing as a separate entity. Through this growth and subsequent discovery of new things in life, the marriage grows in leaps and bounds. It never stays stale and stagnant, as both spouses discover new things about their world, themselves and ultimately each other.
It also helps to keep a marital union fresh and alive, by giving the respective partners some space when needed, and an evolved learning curve in discovering and rediscovering everything 360 degrees. A loss of who one is can be very devastating to the marriage, as the room for growth, adaptation and change basically disappear. The relationship can ultimately destabilize, as the spouse who has sacrificed it simply is living through his/her partner and seeing the world through their eyes, and not their own. A couple that does not grow and change together, and this can affect both life partners, is a union that at the very least will be stressed. It can also face numerous more issues.
Laugh, live and grow old together. But add to the flavors and nuances of your marital partnership through your individual growth as a person, a human being. It makes the world of a difference in any marriage.