When guys that haven’t much experience in the world of dating finally decide that they are going to try to get a girlfriend one of the last hurdles they have to get past is their fear. The fear I am writing of is not that nervous feeling you get when you are approaching and then talking to a woman though it can feel exactly the same. The fear I write of is a fear of failure. It is a feeling that lets doubt creep into your mind and lets momentary hesitation become inaction. You failed to get the girl? So what? All is not lost with failure in fact much more is gained in information that you can use to analyze what mistakes you have been making.
You want to go out into the world and give it your best try and not just in meeting girls but in everything. You do not go out and fail intentionally but you accept that failure is opportunity that presents itself by shouting in your face. Ignoring your faults and you will never solve them the only way to do so is to confront them head on.
If you ask out the girl you have had your eye on and she says no to you advances how much does that really effect your dating life in the grand scheme of things? Not much. She is simply one of many. But in your failures with her what can you derive from them to make sure the same thing doesn’t cause you to not succeed again? Were you too aggressive? Too weak? Too boring? Do you now see what you need to work on?
Your self-conscious feelings that everyone is watching you and that if you do not succeed with this one girl then you will be branded a loser for life. Now as an adult I don’t remember many particulars about what was going on in the 7th grade. I vaguely remember the girls I failed trying to get or the girls that actually liked me. Looking back on it all now I don’t get embarrassed or have regrets about how I blew it with whatever girl I had a thing for at the time, I see it as the learning experiences of adolescence. That is life, as time passes it won’t matter that this girl didn’t like you. What matters is that you tried and learned from your experience. What good is sitting back and thinking of what could have been? You may not be here tomorrow. What is funny about dating is that if you get rejected by a girl she may very well date you at a later point in time. It is all about improving yourself (How Do I Get a Girl to Like Me? It All Starts by Changing You).
If you want to get a girlfriend you have to take risks and part of taking risks is making mistakes. Remember you don’t have to play perfectly to win the game.