Helping someone through Depression
Here are some suggestions:
- If you yourself have ever been depressed, remember that time and think back to what you wanted the people around you to do or not do. Sometimes the best solutions come from our own experiences.
- Look at this person the same way you would see a physically injured person. You would not try to race a person with a broken leg. You are just not able to see a physical injury that is making this person feel so hurt.
- There are times a person who is depressed really only needs to get their thoughts out, to have someone to listen to them and even if this person is making no sense whatsoever in their logic right now, they really just want to get something (feelings) out of their head and into the waste can. Remember you do not have to always be a critic, once they get to feeling better emotionally you can always revisit these thoughts and see if they are still on the same page.
- Patience, you need to slow down and try to be patient while understanding this person’s frame of mind. That can be very hard in our world these days where we are all going 90 miles an hour all the time. This person wants some quality time; they are not your “next project to fix and move on”.
- Be in the now. Don’t remind the person that last week they were fine or next month they won’t even remember this. They are experiencing it now; they need your help and understanding, now.
- Don’t make the mistake of thinking that the person enjoys being in this mind trap of emotions, they don’t. Sleeping too much, eating too much or too little, any imbalance is not a fun place to be.
- Try to keep a schedule with the person. If you can, arrange to visit every Saturday at 10:00 or call at the same time every Monday and Wednesday. This gives the person some structure and also lets them know they can depend on you to be there for them not only when it’s convenient for you.
- If you know they cannot clean their home or pay bills or do any “normal” day to day tasks, help them. If you don’t want to mow the lawn then hire someone who does. Sometimes just having a clean fresh home and surroundings can have a big effect on depression.
Sometimes we just need some company, a smile, watch a movie together, small stuff, just getting through life with another soul, makes the load less heavy