Deciding to start over a bit. Been feeling trapped in this facade of nothingness, that doesn’t even make sense, I could care less. I’m ready to leave this town..its holding me back. That’s not a facade I try to put on, like I am to cool for this town or anything, I just know this isn’t it. Looked through too many photographs, too many films, too many magazines, too many newspapers. And what I’ve seen, has not gone unnoticed. I notice it all, everything, ever intricate detail. Everything I’ve seen is burned, etched, seared into my memory, my mind, my heart, my soul. The words, the images, the moving pictures flash before my eyes continuously.
And I’ve been good at shrugging them off, trying to look away, but they inspire me. They help me keep breathing. And inspiration is what keeps me living, it’s what keeps me driving toward whatever I’m driving toward. So about this starting over deal, sounds like a lame new years resolution or something. How disgusting is that? pretty damn disgusting I would say, but this ain’t no resolution ya’ll. I’ve decided to refute it all, look at what I can do and not what I wish I could be doing. I need to be glad of where I am, and who I am here with, cause nothings the same forever. I don’t want this place forever at all, yet there are certain parts I want forever. Certain people. I’ve written an amount, actually typed an amount, but the satisfaction isn’t there yet. I feel I have more to say.