Maintaining my Coolness…Part Two

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For the months of October, November, into the
first week in December, I was Cool.

I floated in that rarefied atmosphere where only
those worthy to live were allowed.

I could wander over to ‘Heaven’ in the Cafeteria,
I could speak to Class Queens, and most of all,
my opinions were given extra weight.

I was asked everything, from what colour to dye
hair, to how high a hemline should be. My choices
of music became the standard.

Serfs who dared criticise me were given a sniff
by my minions and became figures of ridicule.

No Duchess was given more deference than I, when
I became Cool in High School

Alas, when Morbid Monday came, and it was learned
that I was NOT invited to Janelle’s Party, I would be
returned to Nerd corner in ignominy.

I had to attend Janelle’s party.
Hence I had to crash Janelle’s Party.

The amount of thought I put into how I would crash
this party would have gotten me a scholarship to

Not to put too fine an edge on it, I lied.
I lied to my parents about where I was going.
I lied to my clothing about why I was stuffing
them into a bag.

I entered the Castle of Janelle just after the first
handful of guests and began exploring the venue
to get all details.

I appointed myself official greeter for later arrivants.
I made numerous circles of the room, stopping to
exchange pleasantries with everyone.

I strode with such confidence it boardered on arrogance,
and wore this almost smug smile on my face as I tasted
canapes, swayed to the music, and used the bathroom.

I absconded when Janelle learned I was breathing her

On Monday, I regaled serfs with who wore what, who
was with whom, what was served, as if I had been
employed as party critic.

Janelle was so incensed, as were her minions, that
it must be spoken. This of course freed me from
having to do Janelle’s homework.

As no one knew the truth of what had happened
between us, stories ranged from flirting with her
boyfriend, to insulting her mother. I, of course,
said nothing, which added to my coolness.

The significance of crashing Janelle’s Party taught
me vital life skills.

Years later, when I not invited to important
functions, I crashed.


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