Politicians, film stars, pop stars they all do it with ease but you never here where they learn this skill. I am talking about the automatic smile the one that says “god my feet hurt, can I go home now please?”. Don’t get me wrong smiling is nice to see and most of the time I would imagine its easy to smile when you have just won an election, your film has just broken box office records or you get to number one in the charts.
Somewhere, however, I am convinced there is, deep in the country surrounded by tall trees and maybe disguised as a health spar, a University of the Smile, a place where the smile is king, incorporating , I imagine, a dental clinic with the professions finest, a tooth capping factory of wondrous proportions. Honestly I hope this is true the alternative is some kind of cheek implant which manipulates muscles by remote control, check this next time you see your favourite famous person on the TV, if they have their hands in their pockets there could be a button somewhere.
Day one At the University of the Smile
“This is our first day ladies and gentleman and all we will be doing is measuring what we call your Smile Endurance after which you are free to acclimatise to your surroundings, if you would all line up against the wall, please”.
A bulky man named Toro comes into the room with a basket full of tomatoes, eggs, and a book entitled “How to Abuse”. Toro takes his work seriously and lays into the students verbally while hurling tomatoes and eggs at their unrehearsed smiles, the class of 2008 begins its term.