Love is a Decision

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When we think of love, we often feel a general warm, fuzzy feeling inside, so gentle it makes you a smile.

True. Love is often associated with feelings. But Love isn’t all cuddly and smiles. Love could be tough too.

Married couples who have been together for 10 years often find that feelings wear off. One day, they wake up and find themselves asking “where has the magic gone?”

The sad fact is couples often associate love with emotions. When the emotions subside, they often go to great lengths trying to recapture the past. If their efforts fail, they turn to other people to find the magic. Then they say, “they’re in love”. The marriage is wrecked.
Of course, after several years, the feeling subside and the vicious cycle continues.

Before you get to the point of no return, please try to remember that love is not just based on feelings.


You decide to fall in love.
You decide to marry the person.
You decide to be with the person for the rest of your life.

Emotions come. Emotions go.

It is the DECISION to stay together that remains.

When the magic is gone, then the need to exercise free will in the form of deciding the fate of the relationship comes in.
Saying goodbye is the easy way out. It is the coward’s way. There are no struggles. No painful weighing of consequences required. Just whims and wishes.

Remaining to be with one person for the rest of your life is not easy to choose especially if temptations knock on the door. But… it shows strength of character. It shows will power as opposed to mere practice of free will.

I am not saying that separation should be excluded from the options. If it is, it should be as a last resort.

If you leave just because the magic is gone, then you are in for a rude awakening. The magic will always go away. Things change. People change. It is not possible for feelings to remain the same.

Only the DECISION to stay in love will make the relationship stay the same.


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