1) We have to first admit that we feel lonely. This is difficult perhaps because the world celebrates and encourages popularity. Many people feel that lonely people are also unwanted and are uncomfortable with that possibility. But loneliness is not about others as much as it is about the one who feels lonely.
2) Take the time to list the reasons that you feel lonely. What I found is that often when we try to list the reasons that we think that we feel lonely we uncover other issues. For me, I realized that I was still grieving the loss of my mother.
3) Look at your list and for each item and write down one thing that you can do to make that issue go away. For example, I realized that I needed to find grief counseling and support to address how much I was hurt from losing my mother. Taking the steps to do something about what bothers you is a great move towards overcoming it.
4) Now list everything that is good about you. This is often difficult when feeling lonely because many lonely people also fail to see their own value. That you are still alive is the first place to start. Maybe you have a great smile, a love for animals, a green thumb, like to write, etc. Don’t be shy about writing good things about yourself.
5) Give thanks for how wonderfully you are made. You should realize that your uniqueness is a precious gift to the world.
6) Now list at least 3 people that you know personally, appreciate and care about.
7) Think about and make a list of all the things that you believe are good about them. It is wonderful that you have the ability to see the good in others. Many people are so sorry for themselves that they cannot find the good in others.
8) Give thanks for these people being in your life. They are a blessing to you and probably care for you also. People tend to feel when they are cared about and appreciated and return the sentiment it in their own way.
9) Write down what you would like to do to help others who might be feeling lonely. Thinking about others is a great way to take the focus off of your own issues.
10) Make plans to act on what you have in your list to help others overcome their loneliness. You will find that in trying to help others, you will also help yourself. You will not have to look far to find people who could use this help.