These days I asked a lot of persons, “ Can a boy and a girl be pure friends forever？”
The answers are almost definitely no.
I am often teased jokingly by colleagues “This is your Nth boy friend.”, following another sentence “ May be this count is less of estimation.”
The close colleague frankly said to me in private “ You give others an impression that you are ambiguous with many men.”
Looking back, I find that:
Firstly, during these several years, The friends who frequently keep contact with me by phone and messages are mostly male.
Secondly, the friends who asked me for money are all males, and the friends whom I asked money for are almost male.
Thirdly, I wrote an article to cherish my valuable memory about my college. I listened to my inner voice carefully, according to my inner feeling with no hypocrisy and affectation, the most four important friends who can keep record in my that particular period of life are all male.
Fourthly, the friends who comes to see me from far away are almost male.
Fifthly, when I go out to another city, the friends who I can rely on are almost male.
Sixthly, I also have some intimate male colleagues.
Selfexaminating, “ Is there anything wrong?”
I told my puzzle to my college good friend. I said to her “ I like the feeling more than a friendship and less than affection.” She said “Does he also think so?”
Admittedly, this kind of feeling and relationship in my inner heart maybe just one-sided opinion. There may be two kinds of facts.
First, the male friend is very important in my inner heart. I like, appreciate and adore him. We talk and communicate a lot. However, maybe this communication is just a need of life. Maybe in his inner heart, I am not so important and valuable as I think.
Second, the male actually has deep affection and crush on me, however, maybe because of self-contempt, or some other earthy reasons, he hasn’t expressed his deep feeling to me. Infatuation makes one be nice to the partner, makes one care and concern the partner. It makes me trust and rely on him. However, I am too beef-witted to understand his deep feeling under his friendliness. Besides, the pursuer who has been refused by me maybe would not like lose contact and communication with me, and gradually we become intimate friends.
However, these are all not so important. No matter whether it is that I care about him more or he cares about me more. The fact is that this is the such state of our relationship, the such way how we get together, and the such feeling I feel. Certainly, I can’t assure his feeling, because we can’t and will never talk about our relationship and our feeling for each other. If we talk, our relationship will break or change into love. This saying comes from my experience. This is just a kind of feeling which can make you ponder and fancy infinitely.
In my inner heart, I always believe that there is a kind of relationship between friendship and affection. It’s more than friendship and less than affection, pure and lasting, frank and natural, worthy being cherished and yearned for a whole life. It’s called by authority “ male intimate” for the man and “ female intimate” for the woman.
No matter how many are scandals about me from others, only myself know it clearly that I haven’t cross the borderline of love with some intimate male friends. However, Admittedly, we are intimate and we frequently contact with each other. We care about and help each other. We both laugh together when we are happy and weep tears together when we are sad.
In fact, I always enjoy this kind of relationship and feeling. What’ s more, after tasting all kinds of sensations including kinship, friendship and love, I think it is the most wonderful feeling and relationship.
In fact, this kind of relationship is not so mysterious and abstruse as people think. Regardless of sex, it’s just an intimate friendship between two bosom friends between a man and a woman.
Because of the difference of sex, it has more advantages than the friendship between two bosom friends of the same sex.
Firstly, you can get a lot of attendance. For example, if your computer is poisoned, if you want to move home, if you meet sexual harassment, you can ask your male intimates for help. The strong men will stand out and solve all the problems for you. If you own one or two males intimates, you will have the sense of safety, because you know that there is always someone standing for you at your back.
Secondly, men and women have their own different peculiarities. But men and women need to know about each other, which is based on our happiness. The male intimate is a good way for you to know about men. Through male intimates, we can understand them well as well as their world, so that we can adjust our way to be suitable for them. It’s the same for men.
Thirdly, more importantly, we can get consolation and comfort in spirit from male intimates. In my opinion, nowadays, we don’t lack the enjoyment in substance even satisfaction in sex. However, we are often lonely in our spirit. The male intimates, unlike our lover, don’t spend together with us all the time. But when we are mirthful or heart-struck, we will deeply think of him with comfort and warmth. The true male intimates, will care you with his true heart. He will infuse you the courage to strive when you lose heart, will remind you when you are arrogant, will carefully analyse the reasons and help you with difficulty when you meet with troubles both in daily life and job. He has no requirement and appetency for you. Your relationship is pure, frank and natural like brothers. The annoyance you can’t say to lover can be confided to him, and the secrets you can’t tell to bosom female friends can be revealed to him. Mostly, the males and females who can be intimate friends are always attracted by the spirit of each other. You two has a wonderful and sprightly communication in spirit world. You both are deeply infatuated with each other’s spirit and thought. The thoughtful communication between a thoughtful man and woman, equaling to assimilate the distillate of thought of men and women, which is the most lucky thing in the life for everyone.
Finally, men are usually generous, optimistic and humorous. It’s a rare enjoyment for a woman to get together with this kind of persons. You will enjoy the true friendship from them. Whatever, there is always sex attraction, so both will usually cherish and care each other. Moreover, the man and the woman who can be intimate must be has good impression for each other, although for some reasons they can’t be lovers. If only you both master the measure between male and female, you two can be intimate friends.
Discussing this topic, most of people think that it maybe can exist but can’t last forever. However, can the friendship between two bosom friends of the same sex be forever? Even affection have a period of verdure. None can be absolutely forever in the world. If you both cherish and take care of it with your true heart, it will last long and even forever.
When I almost finish this article, I read this sentence on the Internet “ the man who own the female intimates is one of the most intelligent man among men, and the woman who is the female intimate must be the elite among women. Therefore, the woman who own the male intimates must be one of the most intelligent woman among women, and the man who is the male intimate must be the elite among men.
Therefore, I shout insolently” I am very proud and happy.”