Parenting is tough. And if you do not have a helping hand and have to handle the kids by yourself, the effort can be magnanimous. Your entire schedule seems to revolve around the kids. Right from the time you wake up and pull the kids out of bed till the time you put them to sleep, everything has to be adjusted to suit the kids. If the kids are boys and are on their way to be teenagers, I am sure you tend to forget about yourself. But then that’s the catch isn’t it? How much can you ignore yourself?
The quest for love is a never ending one. Previous relationships might have been mistakes but then the one person made for you might still be out there. But unfortunately you do not seem to find the time to seek him out, since you are too busy with the kids. So there you have a choice. You either remain single for the rest of your life or be smart and find a workaround for keeping everyone happy. I came up with the following points when I started dating after a divorce. My boy was growing and growing fast. If I was to find someone, I needed him to like her. Having his mother in the same town meant he would be seeing her frequently. But now I am in a steady relationship and might end up marrying my present girlfriend. My boy likes her and we a happy family now.
Rules to follow:
1. Do not frequently mention about your ex.
The Offspring had a very interesting song called “she’s got issues”. The singers girlfriend manages to talk nonstop about her ex. This of course spoils the singer’s mood. Try not to mention about your ex at all. This will reassure your current girlfriend/boyfriend that you have forgotten about the past and are looking to a happy present and a bright future.
2. Involve the children.
Once you know you have found the right one, do not hesitate to involve the children. It is always better to involve them right from the time you start dating steady. Children take time to forget and move on. Give them that time. Let them adjust to your new life. Once they are accustomed then it’s more than half the battle won. One of the best ways of doing this is having dinner together or catching a nice movie together.
3. Do not hesitate to go out on a date.
Date and date steadily. The dream man or the woman walking into your life happens only in the movies. Fate helps those who help themselves. Help yourself. Find the woman of your dreams. Do not let your past sour experience dampen your present. The more you date, the more likely you are in finding the right one.
4. Make love.
Now isn’t that important in any relationship? But how do you go about it with he children in the house. Simple, put them to sleep. You could send them off for spending some time with your parents for the vacations. Think and you will come up with a thousand ways. Making love strengthens the relationship and you know how your partner is in bed. So go ahead. Indulge.
Follow these simple ways and in no time you will have your happy life back again. Do not let the monotonous family life take over. Being a single parent does not take away your right to love and being loved. Search with your heart and you will find the right one soon. And work towards finding him/her.