Swine Flu…Mass Murders or Mass Hysteria?

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When it first came out people were saying, “Have you heard? There’s a new disease – swine flu,” which would very often be followed with an oink and a wink.  With myself, friends and family being in the UK, whatever was going on in far off Mexico was only midly interesting.  Of course we acknowledged the fact that it appeared to be a terrible illness (or so it seemed) but it didn’t really affect us.  And when tourists came back with it and had to be quarantined we weren’t too bothered either.  If anyone felt a bit ill or strange they would update their facebook status with swine flu inuendo.

Then there was a fatality and another and another.  Now we started to pay more attention.  The NHS set up a phone line so a person could call up to check their symptoms.  Every time a person had a cough or sneeze people would physically remove them from work or school.  Now I was still very skeptical of it being very catchy, that the general public would get it.  Anyone who I’d heard of to get it seemed seriosly ill.  Only when I started feeling flu-ey and confided in a colleague did alarm bells start to go off.  I was bundled out of work and put in a taxi home.  I could feel the pain and heaviness in my chest getting stronger and stronger.  I called the NHS who confirmed I had the symptoms and told me not to leave the house for five days.  Even if i was feeling well again by the third day I couldnt go out in case of “infected the surrounding area” or words to that affect.

Forcing myself not to panick I started to answer all the worried text messages I was getting from friends and family.  I told them all not to worry and recieved some anti-viruls from the doctor through the letterbox.  So luckily because I’m rather healthy and not asthmatic or diabetic I’m not dying.  In fact i think I prefer the pig version of flu to the human one, it’s really not that bad.  No sore throats or earrache, just achey joints, fever, shivering, sweating, neck and shoulder pain, constant coughing, difficulty breathing, chest pain, nausia and headaches.  Oh wait, think I forgot the diarrohea.  No, i definately don’t envy the pigs every winter, knowing what they go through.

So today is DAY FIVE.  I am leaving the house tomorrow after my isolation!  This, I must tell you is extremely exciting, if it wasn’t for the internet I’m not quite sure what I would have done.  Retail therapy can defiately be performed form bed nowadays!  No more jokes about how my curly tail and snout are doing!  No more referrances to Miss Piggy from the Muppets!

I don’t think we have much to worry about.  Anyone who’s healthy, over the age of elevan and under sixty-five should be okay.  As I type there are laborotories and scientists making up an antidote so there won’t be anymore deaths than the seventeen in the UK that have already been.

I wonder what will be next? We’ve had mad cow disease, bird flu and now pig flu.  Maybe there’s a conspiracy out there, the sheep will strike next!  In the meantime enjoy your health and your farmyard animals! 🙂

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