Work Place Bullies

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If you have been in the work force more than one or two years you’ve have probably come across a coworker or two who wreaks havoc in the workplace, and make your and the other employees work life miserable.

These work place bullies are easy to spot. They are the ones you see trailing after your boss, trying to have a private word with him or her on a regular basis, reporting to the employer any little infraction or making up their own to pass along. They are the one that is usually behind a good deal of the trouble between other co workers, using innuendo, and misrepresentations to cause hurt feelings. They never accept the blame for their own mistakes and more often than not they use every opportunity and means to make others look less than competent. They create a work environment, that is often tense and sometimes chaotic because they thrive on this time of environment. They use intimidation and manipulation to get ahead, because they have found that it works.

It is important to understand what motivates these people to act the way they do.

  • While most work place bullies present a front of confidence in themselves, inside they are really feeling the opposite. They suffer from extremely low self esteem and need to make others feel bad so that they can feel superior to them.

  • They feel out of control or unhappy with their own lives and so seek control of others as a means of feeling power.

  • They either lack the skills to do the job they have, or are afraid they lack the skills and will be discovered. So they try and even the board by trying to bring everyone down to their level.

While most people dislike and some even fear this kind of person, they should be pitied.

They live a miserable existence, probably have few real friends, and don’t or can’t like themselves. And while, they can make our work lives less than ideal, it is always smart to remember that they are often more miserable than they can make us.

So How does one deal with a work place bully

  • The first and most important step in diffusing a work place bully’s power is to do your job as well and as competently as you can. If you are good at your job, giving your best effort day in and day out, eventually even an employer who has fallen for the bully’s manipulations will see that your work is not the problem, and that instead of running to them with stories about others you are taking care of business. Their business.

  • Don’t give the bully the satisfaction of a reaction. They thrive on seeing people upset or angry. Nothing stops a bully faster than not giving them what they want.

  • While sometimes confronting the bully helps, and it tends to make you feel better more times than not it is better to avoid any kind of confrontation unless there are witnesses present. While most of us like to deal with problems privately, a work place bully will find a way to turn even the mildest confrontation around so that you seem to be in the wrong.

  • Maintain friendly relations with your other co workers. While many times, a bully has created an atmosphere of mistrust between you and the other workers, staying friendly and upbeat with them, will soon have them questioning everything the bully says and does.

  • Don’t take what happens at work home with you. While this is always good advice, in this situation it is important. Worrying and stewing over a work place bully’s action at home gives them the ultimate control over you. Enjoy your family, your friends, and your out of work activities to the fullest. By doing this you can maintain a sense of balance and thwart the bully’s efforts at the same time.

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