Self Esteem in relationships – Love Potion Number 9

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From childhood we are sold on an ideal image of beauty, one few of us ever see reflected when we look in the mirror. But, there is something to be said for the quote “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” because how you view your self not only dictates your level of self-esteem, but also the kind of love that you will attract in your relationship.

This article will show you how you can look in the mirror and despite the ideal, see only a beautiful you on the exterior as well as the interior.

When you look in the mirror, what’s the first thing you notice, and how does it make you feel?

If you’re like most people, the first thing that catches your eye is probably your least favorite asset. If so, don’t worry you’re not alone. Here’s why.

Can you guess how much money is spent in just one year by advertisers to sell us on the concept of the ideal image of beauty?

Well, I can’t either but I do know this it’s a lot of money, certainly somewhere in the billions of dollars!

So, technically, you can consider yourself brainwashed.

From your earliest childhood days when you played with Barbie you’ve been receiving constant, consistent images telling you what beauty is supposed to look like.

Never mind that these images are for the most part, anatomically impossible!

And, would you really want to look like Pam Anderson? Honestly?

I’m guessing probably not.

So, here’s how you can build your confidence with the body God gave you:

1.Look in the mirror

2.This time, really look at yourself.

Reflect on the compliments you have received.

Do people tell you how great your hair is?

How beautiful your eyes are?

That you have a nice smile? Try to see what they see.

3.Stand far enough away from the mirror so that you can take it all in. What do you see? Find at least three positive things.

4.Now, get up close.Really close.

Look at your eyes, the irises.

What color are they?

Are they all one color or are there flecks of various colors?

How would you describe them using positive analogies or adjectives?

5.Now, smile. What does your smile convey? Warmth? Happiness?

6.Find at least three characteristics you like best about yourself, and then accentuate them as you dress to go out.

Love your eyes, make sure your hair doesn’t cover them up

Love your lips? Make sure to keep them soft and moisturized

Your hair? Get a flattering cut and condition it regularly to keep it shiny and healthy

In short, amplify what you like, and don’t worry about the parts you don’t.

Here are some ways to do just that:

1. Go shopping and bring a good friend. Ask them to help you pick out colors and clothes they think flatter you. Don’t worry if your first reaction is “that’s not me!” Experiment!

2.Feel better about whatever it is you don’t like about yourself by picturing the absolute worst-case scenario. Exaggerate whatever it is you’re hung up on and blow it up in you mind until it’s comical. Then look in the mirror. not so bad anymore is it?

3.Accept yourself for who you are, how you look, and focus on what really matters “the things about you that can’t be seen”your heart, mind and soul!

4.What do you want people to praise you for? Is it really how you look? Probably not. You probably want people to think you’re funny, smart, nice, or generous;something along those lines right?

Make a list of your positive personal qualities and characteristics. Then ask yourself, what’s more important? Get involved in activities that build on your personal characteristics;volunteer, join a club, take a class to sharpen a talent. These will help you emphasize and focus more on the more important qualities that get you through life successfully and with more fun.

Now of course all of the abovementioned techniques are things you can do to improve your confidence on the exterior. However, what you do on the inside is just as critical. You see true self confidence comes from within, so learning how to overcome your fears and insecurities is the key to overall success. Tapping in to your true feminine power from the inside out will create unstoppable confidence in every aspect of your life including your relationship. I refer to this power as Feminine Grace! A woman that walks with feminine grace exudes confidence. She is not afraid to articulate her needs or follow her dreams. She is not afraid to give unconditional love because she knows self love. She is admired and respected by others for her strong yet loving and caring qualities. So, it’s not only what you see in the mirror, but also what you see inside that will attract the love you’ve always wanted.

Best wishes,

David Roppo
The Relationship Rehab Coach

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